New Beginnings and Choices (Dancing & Leadership)

I arrived at the location few minutes before we began. The people leading the session were already setup with the AV. Many people had name tags, so I put one on too. I had curiosity but not really worries. After all, I had been doing this for a while. We first looked at the basics as a group. Few minutes later attendees got together in pairs and that’s when I got completely thrown off. Lindy was not like east coast at all, even though the beat was the same and I could do 3/4s or 4/4s as easily. For the next 30 minutes I struggled and wasn’t much of a lead. Did I mention this was at the beginner’s Lindy class?

I’ld normally ask the trainer in such circumstances but I didn’t know where to begin. They were focused on encouraging attendees vs focusing on technique or specifics. As I reflect back on the session, I come to the conclusion they had to risk some confusion to keep the overall group focused. After all, by the end of the hour, we had all gotten the basics down. It reminds me on of the harder parts of leadership, knowing when there will be unavoidable confusions, and instead of getting mired in it, focusing on the next key milestone. Still, part of me wonders how others feel when we are or enabling others’ experience at work.

I eventually realized why I was getting mixed up when one of my dance partners asked “you did East Coast didn’t you?” and pointed out a key leading difference between the two. The person that was supposed to be my follower got us through to where we needed to be. (see earlier entry on “Learning from followers”). Even this had parallels to work. It is often not the person driving the entire group that facilitates the ground level alignment. It’s often those that had similar experiences before that raise the entire group experience, one interaction and dialogue at a time.

Few days past since that class and I am glad for the new beginning. Now I am learning new basic skills while polishing what I have known. I am convinced they will build upon each other over time. Also, as I make these conscious connections between dance and the day job, I also think working will get better and easier.

Until next time.

Learning to Lead from Experienced Followers (Dancing & Leadership)

On the dance floor, just like in business, there is often a discrepancy of skill and knowledge between the individuals. Even in few minute long dances, such differences can make a positive or negative difference to the overall experience.

Sometimes the leader knows more “moves”, but leading skills are still developing. Sometimes the follower has more knowledge. And sometimes, follower may have more leadership experience but within that moment, it’s not his or her role.

The simplest example of the latter is when I take dance lessons. In private instruction, I know my instructor, dancing the follower part, know more than I do. So there is no ego if or when she makes suggestions or observe what or how I am doing the moves as we jointly explore ways to improve. Often, I’ld ask her to do the lead part so I can explore the follower’s role, which is when many things click. This interactive coaching style is much more helpful than textbook instructions on technique by the way.

Out at a dance floor, or in “the real world”, it is more ambiguous. I don’t know, but can often sense quickly, if our levels are on par as well as our styles (East Coast and Lindy has different basic steps). This means I need to have a feedback loop, both physical and verbal, to see how we are doing and what all we can do.

An easy feedback is if it feels right and in step, if connection is maintained vs stepping on each others shoes, kicking the shins, or spinning out into others instead of maintaining balance. An even easier (if your partner is willing) feedback approach is asking how it feels. I got many good tips on not only how to lead in general but how to lead in specific given personal dynamics by simply talking through things. Of course there is also the fun times when we step away from the main stage to figure just how that one move worked. Joint learning and exploring is fun.

Being new in lead roles can be uncomfortable and leading more experienced could be people even more so. It is easier however when we start with a mutual goal and everyone can learn whether through leading, following, or the joint feedback loops. Without such continuous learning, i’ld be bored 🙂

Cheers